This Is My Story: Bonnie Culver
Overcoming the Darkness:
Choosing God’s Wonderful Fulfillment and Peace
I was a busy General Manager of a large hotel when one day I completely lost control of my whole left side. While working that morning, I suddenly could not walk very well nor could I use my left hand properly.
At the hospital, the doctors performed a series of tests. It became apparent to me that things were serious when the E.R. doctor came to my room the next day to make certain that I was alive. According to him, if I had arrived at the hospital ten minutes later, I would have been dead. After a few tests, a doctor concluded that I had three cancerous brain tumors. This is my story of how I found the strength to face this devastating situation.
As a young child, I had accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior. I can still remember hearing the story about Jesus dying on the cross for my sins, and I can remember going into a room to prayerfully repent and ask Jesus to forgive me of 
my sins. I wanted Him to take me to heaven when I died. I trusted the promise of John 3:16 which says, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” Jesus, being God, loved you and me so much that He was willing to lay aside His home in Heaven to come to earth to die for our sins and to rise again. In Isaiah 64:6a God says, “But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags.”
We are all sinners and deserve death and hell. Romans 6:23 says that “the wages of sin is death.”
Good News
But the good news is that the rest of that verse says that “the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ the Lord.” I trusted Christ’s work on the cross and His resurrection to save me from hell and give me eternal life. Salvation is a free gift that cannot be earned. There is only one way to get to heaven, accept His free gift. God sent His Son so that He could get close to you and me.
When I heard about the brain tumors, I was so discouraged.
I wept until a Bible verse came to mind.
Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.”
I said, “Okay, Lord,” and I stopped crying. Isaiah 26:3 says that God “will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on” Him. That perfect peace began to settle into my soul.
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The doctors continued to run more tests for cancer elsewhere but none could be found. The doctor put me on steroids and began to see improvement, so much so that he ordered an MRI. After a few more tests, the doctors told me that I did not have cancerous brain tumors but
Multiple Sclerosis. As you can imagine, my whole life was changed.
Though I had trusted Christ as a small child, the Lord was showing me what it meant to trust Christ and Christ alone.
You can listen to two interviews with Bonnie by clicking the players below.
I stayed at a church parsonage while I was on the mend from the serious MS attack that made me lose control of my whole left side. This time allowed me to reflect more deeply on my relationship with Jesus Christ. I thought about my life before the MS. I was used to being in control. I was a business manager; it was what I went to college for and what I loved to do. It brought me a great amount of joy, satisfaction, and sense of importance. Managers took directions from me and reported to me. Within fifteen minutes that all was gone! Poof! Not only was I not in charge of others, I was not even in charge of myself. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me from day to day, eating, sleeping, working if at all, or if I was going to really live or not.
I remember thinking, “Am I going to have another MS attack and lose my right side as well?”
It was as if I were in a deep, deep, dark tunnel; I could not see. There was no light at the end. All I could do was to feel the sides, but what help was that when I didn’t know where I was going? There seemed to be no way out of the tunnel. Since I could not see a thing, I certainly could not have brought myself out of that tunnel. I could barely walk, and I had very little strength. No, I had to completely trust God to bring me out of that tunnel. I am so glad for that lesson now (even though I wasn’t happy about it then), for it changed me. It has proven to help me over and over again. In John 8:12, Jesus said “I am the light of the world; he that follows after Me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.” Jesus gave me light in my tunnel.
Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
In the midst of great difficulties, I now have great peace that I would have never had before. I don’t need to be anxious for anything because I have learned to trust the Lord completely.
Have you ever placed your trust in Jesus Christ for the life of your eternal soul?
The key word here is trust, complete-without-reservation-or-holding-anything-back trust. Salvation is not Christ plus something else. It is not Christ plus your good works or your church. It is not trusting in your head knowledge of who you’ve heard Him to be. Have you trusted Him with a personal trust from your heart that He is the only one who can and will save you? Do you know in your heart that He knows you?
Can you point to a time in your life when you willingly trusted Him to be your Savior?
Calvary Baptist Church, 2000 Broad Ave., Findlay, OH 45840
info@cbcfindlay.org
419.422.6842
You can listen to two interviews with Bonnie by clicking the players below.
